A Little Poem About Boys

Yes, these are my own sketches, and yes they are of actual boys I have liked. 

I have a love and hate relationship with them. Don't we all?

They can be arrogant, snarky, sassy, and crude.

Sometimes, they're courteous, selfless, and gentlemen-like.

If you find single when most of your friends are in a relationship,

you may find yourself wanting, hoping, desiring more.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures

You lunge at any decent guy who's willing to strike up a convo

You fantasize their lips on yours

You imagine hands locked together, walking along the beach at dusk

It'd be nice if all the hot guys in the world initiated things, you'd think.

If the guy you liked woke up one day and realised you were special

That you had a unique place in his heart

Dreams and fantasies

intangible, but sometimes they express exactly what you feel

===

Dear 5th Grade Table Partner,

Remember when,
pickup sticks were in the form of the highlighters dropped and picked up.
flushed faces, giddyness and embarrassment
WAR - decks of cards, the shouting, screaming, laughing

For crying out loud,
your scribbled mess on lined paper translated easy As
hockey jocking your way through P.E. sports
obsessive flipping of tousled ash-brown hair
deep, husky whispers that could bring chills down the spine

"Dude"
those lips became a shield against hurt
an afternoon's innocent Jenga became talk of recess

"Smark-Aleck"
a snarky comment from a teacher
I hated her that moment for judging you
while Courtney and the girls flirted with you
I hear, First cheek to cheek, then jaw to jaw
We sipped that cider through a straw.
I should have gone to camp that year.

A year later
On the yellow bus,
nauseating gasoline odor plummets through the air.
violin on my lap, my backpack squash the squeaky seat
You slide next to me
"Hey, can I sit here?"
Yes, yes, of course, I've waited for this day for a long time!
So happy. Need. More. Air. Out of Brea-
Ms. Ex-gf Blonde Locks comes over
"I know it'll suck sitting next to him, come sit over here with me."
Screw that, screw you, but I grinned back and moved to join her
Why am I so easily swayed??!

One lesson I learn from this,
Waiting for a crush to approach you,
you just might be waiting your whole life.


♥